Otherwear

I blocked out this week to do two horrific things: potty train and embark on the Cabbage Soup Diet.

After only two days, I'm already disgusted with cabbage soup, and feel like my entire body reeks of stewed vegetables. But the good news is that I've already lost two pounds, and it appears that our littlest munchkin is by far our most gifted in the toileting department.

She just turned two and a half, which in my (lazy parenting) book is too early for potty training. But at the urging of her preschool teacher, who pretty much promised me that she is too smart for her own good and would be done in a day, I mentally prepared for a week of chasing after a naked toddler and crouching over a potty seat in our smallest bathroom. I bought Clorox spray, loaded up on paper towels, and even sprung for a potty that plays princess tunes.

We stripped her down, bought the tiniest underwear on the market, and realized just how small she really is. We decided that if she was an Indian maiden, her name would definitely be Little Bottom. And we also realized that her clothing options are seriously limited now, with no diaper to help hold her pants up. Where she gets this little bottom is a complete mystery, but I digress.

Little Bottom could not have been more jazzed to get the party started. She is obsessed with her new "otherwear," loves her new toilet, and rewarded me immediately with the pitter-patter sound of her little feet running back and forth to the bathroom all day the first day. She's truly a "big gill" now and even is requesting some space in the bathroom, asking me repeatedly, "Can you give me some privacy please?"

It turns out, she is a total natural. We've had only three accidents in two days, and while I hesitate to jinx myself, I'm calling this mission a success!

Let's hope this bodes well for the results of the Cabbage Soup Diet!